Buried my son last month

Discussion in 'Best Wishes/Remembrances for Loved Ones & Friends' started by FARfetched, Sep 20, 2019.

  1. FARfetched

    FARfetched Active Member

    Messages:
    389
    Likes Received:
    161
    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2018
    Location:
    Sector 706, Planet Georgia
    He had started a moving business. We helped him buy a truck to pull those 26' moving trailers, he was busy and making payments… then his wife's dad called me one morning in early August. (I hate August, always have.)

    The beginning of the end was November. He had diabetes since he was 16, and he started having seizures. He was in the hospital for a month, and the neurologist said he probably wouldn't survive another.

    Fortunately, he had been coming around most weekends through the summer, visiting us and Mason (his son, who lives with us). We were talking about taking the popup to North Carolina next summer, and campgrounds around here this fall. I'm still going to make the trips, and his truck won't even know the Starflyer is behind it. Mason and I are going out this weekend.

    A pic of us from 2012, at Lake Michigan (Manitowoc):
    IMG_3682.JPG.jpg
     
  2. jmkay1

    jmkay1 2004 Fleetwood/Coleman Utah

    Messages:
    4,739
    Likes Received:
    1,643
    Joined:
    Oct 10, 2013
    Location:
    Northern Virginia
    Terribly sorry for your loss. Take that trip you had planned he will be with you in heart.
     
  3. J Starsky

    J Starsky Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    735
    Likes Received:
    520
    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2017
    Location:
    East Central MN
    So very sorry for your loss. We lost my sister a few years ago now. Still very tough on my dad and I today.

    Sorry is the least of my thoughts... I feel for you so much!
     
  4. Sjm9911

    Sjm9911 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    4,368
    Likes Received:
    2,192
    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Location:
    Nj
    No words. Thoughts and prayers.
     
    J Starsky likes this.
  5. neighbormike

    neighbormike Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    2,262
    Likes Received:
    1,640
    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2012
    Location:
    WI
    I am sorry for your loss. Hopefully you will find some comfort in spending time with your grandson. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
     
  6. nineoaks2004

    nineoaks2004 Every meal is a picnic and every Day is a holiday

    Messages:
    7,175
    Likes Received:
    2,965
    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2006
    Location:
    Dukes, Fl
    Sorry for your loss, I lost a Daughter and Grand Daughter a few years ago and the feeling is terrible. Take the trip and dedicate the time to him, I am sure he will be looking down smiling.
     
  7. tzmartin

    tzmartin Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    913
    Likes Received:
    353
    Joined:
    Sep 9, 2015
    Thanks for sharing. Sorry for your loss. I hope you'll have some time to camp and think about your love for him. Sons are always in your heart.
     
  8. megcabra

    megcabra Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,850
    Likes Received:
    464
    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2015
    Location:
    Chapel Hill, North Carolina
    I’m so sorry for your loss to your family. Thoughts and prayers sent your way.
     
  9. Sneezer

    Sneezer Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,527
    Likes Received:
    529
    Joined:
    Aug 8, 2015
    Location:
    DFW, TX
    So sorry. A parent should never outlive their children. May his memory always bring you peace and comfort.
     
  10. Minimalist

    Minimalist Active Member

    Messages:
    240
    Likes Received:
    41
    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2015
    I'm so sorry for your loss. Being with his son and driving his truck will hopefully help you grief.
     
  11. Shaman1

    Shaman1 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    2,234
    Likes Received:
    504
    Joined:
    May 13, 2011
    Location:
    Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
    My condolences. Enjoy the memories with your grandson.
     
  12. J Starsky

    J Starsky Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    735
    Likes Received:
    520
    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2017
    Location:
    East Central MN
    ...and keep talking to folks about where you are at too! You heal as you will. Happy you could find the strength to share with us.
     
  13. dbhost

    dbhost Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    674
    Likes Received:
    262
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2018
    Location:
    League City, Texas USA.
    I can't even imagine what words I could muster that could offer you any sort of peace at this time. No parent should ever outlive their child.

    I ask your forgiveness if what I say hurts at all, it is not my intent. I simply wnat to share what my experience was, and what helped me after suffering huge losses that were "out of place".

    Last year was beyond miserable for my wife and I, between family, friends, and colleagues we suffered through 20 funerals. And 3 of them were far too close for comfort, we lost both of our fathers, and one of my brothers in law lost his battle with colon cancer. That was Eddy, and I am going to concentrate on our experience with him...

    Eddie wasn't a young man, but he wasn't yet old, at only 51 years old. He was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer 2.5 years before his final passing.

    At the time it looked like the chemo was working, the tumors were shrinking, and his spirits were fairly high, we kept talking about his love of fishing, and how this experience had brought him closer to his siblings and in laws than he had ever been, and how much he wanted to get everyone together for a fishing trip and BBQ at the beach after he got better...

    Well as the chemo wore on, and his immune system got weaker and weaker, we could tell we were watching him slowly fade away, but he kept talking about that fishing trip.

    After the funeral, and well the end of 2018 was behind us all, and everyone left gathered their wits about them, we rented a beach house at his favorite spot, and had the family gather for that last trip. Everyone that could legally do so had a line in the water, and there was the one extra pole in a pole holder in the sand, a chair at the ready, and Eddys favorite beer in the cup holder. A copy of the memorial card thing, not sure what they call it officially, the church bulletin of sorts they hand out at a funeral to tell you about the deceased and the order of the service, with his picture, was framed, and secured to the pole holder.

    We fished, we barbecued, we cried, and we held on to family. And most importantly, we knew that even though he was gone from us in body, he will never leave us in heart of spirit.

    So in my long winded way of getting around to it, for you, for your son, if you can, please, take the trip, complete the plans you had for him, in his honor.
     
    Minimalist, J Starsky and FARfetched like this.
  14. Overland

    Overland Active Member

    Messages:
    249
    Likes Received:
    167
    Joined:
    May 1, 2013
    Location:
    Bristol, Pa
    I'm so sorry for your loss.. please, finish the journey.

    You and yours are in my thoughts and prayers..
     
    dbhost likes this.
  15. FARfetched

    FARfetched Active Member

    Messages:
    389
    Likes Received:
    161
    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2018
    Location:
    Sector 706, Planet Georgia
    Thanks, all.

    The weekend outing was one of those I had hoped he could join us on, so we've already made a start at least.
     
    BikeNFish and J Starsky like this.
  16. DJS12354

    DJS12354 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,554
    Likes Received:
    481
    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2017
    Location:
    Carbondale, PA (Northeast corner of PA)
    Sorry for your loss.
     
  17. Redbird234

    Redbird234 Member

    Messages:
    85
    Likes Received:
    37
    Joined:
    May 27, 2018
    Location:
    GTA
    I am so sorry for your loss
     
  18. Arlyn Aronson

    Arlyn Aronson Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,173
    Likes Received:
    610
    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2014
    Location:
    Houghton, MI
    Gee, that's got to be tough to burring ones own son. Do keep your chin up, we are thinking of ya here.
     
    Last edited: Oct 7, 2019
  19. Camper054

    Camper054 Active Member

    Messages:
    111
    Likes Received:
    45
    Joined:
    Jul 23, 2019
    It is heart wrenching - the heaviest load for a parent or child is the weight of the cascade of their loved one. Very recently I lost my father and I know how painful it can be. It is a sad truth that we all have to leave this mortal life, but never easy to accept when it actually happens. Thoughts and prayers are with you, and all who lost their loved ones.
    MC
     
    FARfetched likes this.
  20. J Starsky

    J Starsky Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    735
    Likes Received:
    520
    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2017
    Location:
    East Central MN
    Something I've read after my sister suddenly passed, then re-read and taken alook at again.. and I hope it helps in some small fashion of comfort, if only in moments of time when you need it:

    death is nothing.JPG
     
    Camper054 likes this.

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.